He said: “In my distress I called to the Lord, and he answered me… Jonah 2:2 NIV

I sat alone in a darkened passage way of the hospital, tears streaming down my face as I poured out my distress to God. In fact, I was begging, barganing and demanding that God save my mum. Diagnosed with cancer only days before. The operation to take out her left kidney and spleen had been successful, but she barely clung to life. The need for blood thinners during the operation caused an internal bleed that could not be stopped. She underwent a number of transfusions but still her life ebbed away. I had been told to call the family to her bedside. I could not think of life without my dear mum, who lived in my home and cheered my life everyday. God just had to heal her, but she slipped further away. Finally, in the stillness I realised that I could not fight against what God had ordained, no matter how much I wanted to. With my heart tearing in two, I said to God. “Okay God, if you want her life to end here, your will be done.” I sat numb and empty, waiting for the final moments, and then mum’s condition changed and somehow the bleeding stopped. She began to improve. God had answered me in my distress, but it seemed that he was waiting for me to submit to his will, before he answered. It is so hard to say, God’s will be done at times, but he knows what is best, and we must trust him, no matter what the outcome.

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